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A message to a mom of an ADHD child

Your child is doing poorly in school even though they seem very bright.

actually your child is working harder than their classmates, only to get a passing grade or fail.

It’s very confusing and frustrating for both of you. You’re giving all the support you can give, yet at the end of the day, you’re left with tears and guilt, you’re doubting your parenting and their efforts.

You have a child with an attention problem, could be ADD, Dyslexia, or ADHD. Those kids have an interesting brain structure that allows them to focus on their materials for a limited period of time, possibly 10–20 minutes, after that, they lose focus and start making the silliest mistakes. Even if they force themselves to focus, they get physical discomfort, they may get dizzy, or have headaches, or have stomach aches, or may vomit which make it very hard to stay focused and they’ll need to move to reverse this discomfort. What’s interesting is that same brain structure gave them many other exceptional abilities.

Their creativity is limitless; they naturally think out of the box.

They have heightened intuition, they easily pick up on subtle cues. They can see things from different angles.

They’re very enthusiastic and persevere through challenges.

They’re very kind-hearted and empathize deeply with others.

They have a delightful sense of humor and can always make you laugh.

They’re the actors, the artists, the visionaries, the dreamers, the innovative leaders, and the extremely successful businessmen and women. Michael Jordan, the greatest basketball player of all time, has ADHD. Steven Spielberg, the most successful Hollywood director, has dyslexia. Sir Richard Branson, great inventor, and Tesla CEO, has ADHD. Jim Carry and Will Smith, both great actors, have ADHD.

Justin Timberlake, one of the world's best-selling music artists, has both ADD and OCD. Simone Biles, seven-time Olympic medalist and one of the greatest gymnasts of all time, has ADHD.

Dear mom of a dyslexic or ADD, or ADHD child: Wipe your tears and Let go of the feelings of guilt and doubt. Your child is not lazy or stupid; your child, is like any other child, wants to get an A+ and have his name called for a trophy, even if it’s once in his whole life.

It’s not fair to accuse them of not putting in enough effort or accuse yourself of being a bad parent. If something should be accused, it’s The rigid, one-size-fits-all education system that doesn’t live up to their unique learning style. The truth is, these kids can focus so well on things they enjoy and that are interesting to them.

They learn in their own unique way. They absorb knowledge through hands-on and exploration.

Their struggle in school is not a measure of their worth or intelligence, their worth is not determined by a report card or a standardized test. Be a solid believer in their abilities. Encourage their curiosity, reward their efforts, and rather than pressuring them to be like everybody else, support them and allow their uniqueness and creativity to flourish.

Accept them, give them your unconditional love, and most importantly, give them your best hug ever.

For more tips or my 1:1 therapy to release your emotional distress visit my website

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